18 posts tagged “cancer”

- If you're a fellow runner reading this do you ever find yourself in a stressful situation and just wishing you could go for a run RIGHT in that moment to work through it? (Even if that's not possible...) I've found this a few times and in one way it's comical and on the other hand I find it adds to the stress that I can't just lace up my runners and go, oh dilemmas!

- It's cold out.  When the cold hits I'm usually a treadmill convert but for some reason I really feel I should try running outside in the winter.  I just get bored with the treadmill so easily and usually come to hate it sooo...I've been reading a few articles about cold weather running.  I'm a bit hesitant to follow the advice and not layer a billion clothes on me (including a down coat and mukluks, hehe jk it's not THAT cold.)  I know I get warmed up running but I'm normally "colder" than most people so going out with a minimal amount of gear seems counterintuitive to me...I guess I just need to test things out.  Don't worry, you'll hear the reports ;)

- I joined a running group with the local running store....I have yet to go running with them ::cough::  Sometimes I can be painfully shy, believe it or not.

- Last but not least: Tomorrow (21 November) is the last day you can donate towards my goal for the Leukemia & Lymphoma Society.  Thanks soooo much again to everyone who has already contributed how they could, be it through a financial donation, time, effort in helping me out, or undying support.  You are all awesome and it's very much appreciated!!!

I will attempt to review the marathon in this post but I have a feeling the words won't come close to how I felt about the experience. 

Over 950 km (600 miles) of training logged and it all amounted to this day, Sunday October 21st, 2007...

I woke up nervous, ten minutes before my alarm went off...I had set out everything the previous night so I didn't have to think much when getting ready.  I had brought a pack of oatmeal with me for breakfast since that's what I normally use.  However, I forgot a spoon.  So I tried to improvise and it wasn't working so I ate a  gel instead.  Threw on my sexy garbage bag and headed out to meet up with my team.  We took a quick picture and headed to the start. 

Waiting around for the beginning was lots of fun.  We weren't awake so we found ourselves giggling at many things that were probably no where near funny, lol.  I kept getting this feeling that I was forgetting something "sunscreen, body glide, underwear, pants, socks, shoes, bra, singlet, bib, hydration belt, gels, camera, hat, hair done up, chapstick, washroom break, etc..." I hadn't forgotten anything.

As we approached the start line I kept saying to myself "start slow, watch the pace, don't rush" and we were off!  It was pretty crowded at the beginning so we walked a bit until people spread out...THEN we were really off ;) It was already hot out at 7AM and I was glad I decided to wear a garbage bag to keep me warm instead of a long sleeved shirt like a lot of people we passed.

Through the entire race I ran with two  others: Shawna and her sister Shena.  We scavenged lai's from the sidelines and put them on our running hats ("If you're going to San Francisco/be sure to wear/some flowers in your hair") I don't think people got that unless we explained it, haha, oh well.  It was a lot of fun! 

Running along Fisherman's Wharf, past a little harbour, and along the ocean was just amazing!  At mile six we hit the largest hill which continued until mile seven with the elevation going from 0 to 300 during that distance.  I ran up the entire thing though and before we knew it we "ate that hill for breakfast!" At the top there was an oxygen bar with quite the lineup but we figured we should stop for the full experience - it was funny and I don't know if it helped any but definitely smelled good.  Reportedly Robin Williams house was there as well...I have no idea if this is true or not and sadly he did not stick his head out of said window to say something funny ;)

We continued on.  Along the way were signs with reasons to run, messages from cancer patients, lots of people cheering including some witty signs that were much appreciated (ie: people dressed in Alcatraz criminal suits holding one that said "Run like you stole something!!!")

It was around the 1hr 45min mark that I realized I hadn't taken in anything nutrition-wise and hardly any gatorade or water.  Oops.  I got completely caught up in the whole marathon buzz atmosphere.  I tried to pay much closer attention to this from then on.  We "ran" into another teammate and she took a picture of us before the road (I think around mile 12) split for the 1/2 mary people and it started to sink in that there was still quite a ways to go.  One foot in front of the other.  I wasn't feeling any pain at this point thank goodness!  We ran around Golden Gate Park which was gorgeous, and by the bridge (actually I think that was a bit before the park) and there was a pedicure station...Is anyone else thinking "wtf?!"  Yeah, last thing I wanted to do was take off my runners in the middle of the marathon to have someone PAINT MY TOENAILS that will probably fall off later anyway.  Seriously now.  Who planned that?!  After the run, ok, awesome...still a little sketch with the sweaty achy feet...but IN THE MIDDLE?!  Yeah...ok that's enough of that rant, haha.

After we went down a rather steep hill along the oceanside and hit mile 18.75 where we crossed before noon (if you didn't you were not allowed to complete the race) so that was awesome knowing that we would not be turned around.  To be quite honest from about mile 12 to that point is a blur.  I was "in the zone" feeling great but also in my own thoughts.  It was great "me" time and for the most part I tried to take in the stunning scenery San Francisco has to offer and thinking about nothing yet everything.

Some things that I don't remember exactly where they were in the race:
- Ghirardelli Chocolate Mile.  Ohhh sweet heaven that was the best tasting chocolate in the world at that moment.  I bet it had to do with running so bloody far, haha.  I know you aren't supposed to try anything new on race day but I couldn't resist this little square of deliciousness (I highly doubt many women could.)  Fortunately, no GI revolts after that. 
- Which segways into the fact that we took three washroom breaks through the race and I was pleasantly surprised that they were stocked well with tp and seat covers. 
- Running and singing is quite a skill; along the course we ran past a girl that had "It's My Birthday!" on the back of her shirt so we sang "Happy Birthday" to her which was a lot of fun!  "O Canada!" was also done twice, lol.

So from 18.75 - mile 24 was pretty frickin' tough.  The distance of the marathon definitely does humble you.  I was developing blisters (which I anticipated since my feet seem to like to do that despite blister prevention socks and body glide slathered all over them.) then I started to get a stitch.  It hurt.  So I ran with my arms up trying to breathe deeply and fill my lungs completely.  I thought this was a sign of dehydration (it was SOOOO hot out, around 32 a teammate told me later that evening) Good thing I slathered on 50 SPF even though it probably was all melting off!  Anyway, so I drank a lot of water....but fast.  Oops. 

So this stupid stitch was stabbing me and we were running around a few lakes.  Theoretically this was nice but you didn't see too much of the lakes except near the beginning and end of the loop around them.  So it was basically pavement, sun, cars, hardly any spectators, and NO AID STATIONS!!  It was definitely a struggle at a few points in those miles.  I am soo thankful Shawna and Shena were with me; they kept me going :)  At one point there was a Canadian guy from AB that spotted us and ran with us for a a while and his encouragement really helped, too.  I was completely out of liquids and down to one more gel.

Once we hit the next aid station I quickly asked the doctor if I was doing the right thing but he said I should have gatorade even though I was eating gels.  So I did and splashed one cup of water on the back of my neck to boot.  The cramp subsided in the next few minutes which was a relief!!  We were also in the homestretch as we hit the mile 25 marker!  Coach Ray and Alicia were there cheering us on which was awesome to see.  The last mile was definitely the longest seeming one of the entire race!  Good thing there was a premium ocean running view.  We crossed the finish line together and we then gladly ate some actual food and basked in the knowledge that we were now marathoners!!

I still have a hard time believing it!  It was a FABULOUS experience and I would do it again in a heartbeat.  I surprisingly was not nearly as sore as I anticipated in the following days (no walking down the stairs backwards like I had to after my first half and then again at 32k & no NSAID's even!!) Maybe it was the ice cold bath with a toque and Earl Grey that warded off the pain...or perhaps my lactate threshold has improved a lot, whatever it was I was thankful!  Now, don't get me wrong because there was pain; it just wasn't as bad as I expected (in fact my hips are still a little sore :P lol.)

So I did it.  I am a marathoner!  I have my finisher's shirt, my finisher's necklace, my space blanket, my 26.2 pin, and a whole lot of confidence now.

To be honest, I thought about why and who I was running for in the beginning before we even started.  Then, in the middle of it all I almost started crying because I was thinking about the affects of cancer too much so I diverted my emotions for a while.  It was definitely in the forefront of my mind through most of the run though.  The entire race was to benefit the Leukemia & Lymphoma Society.  It seemed like everyone had a name on their back.  Which is touching and sickening all at once.  It's great to know we all are passionate about finding a cure but with 22,100 women and 900 men racing you really wish that number was significantly smaller. 

I'll update about San Fran in general in a later post.  Sorry this has taken a while to get up!

Once again, thank you SO much to all of you that have supported me throughout this experience because I certainly would not have been able to accomplish this goal otherwise.  Run for life, my friends.

The marathon is approaching ever so quickly and this has me a bit nervous!  (Ok, maybe more like 'someone might need to tranquilize me on race day' nervous, haha.)  For those of you that don't know, I have been training for my first marathon the past six months and will be participating in the San Francisco Nike Women's Marathon on October 21st which is specifically raising money for the Leukemia & Lymphoma Society.  Make a donation to cancer research if you'd like to help people with these deadly cancers out.

For the race I'll be sticking to clif shots, gatorade, and sharkies for my race nutrition as these seem to be the easiest ones for me to use.  I leave on Thursday for San Francisco, run on Sunday, and leave Monday afternoon.  I'm hoping I'll be able to see a bit of San Fran the few days beforehand since I've never been there before.  I don't think I'll be able to update while I'm there because I don't plan on bringing my computer (too much of a hassle.)  I will for SURE post pictures and recap once I've returned.

To be honest I haven't stuck to my training plan very much the past couple of weeks due to life getting in the way so really my goal will be to just do it.  This is afterall for a cause much more important than a shiny finish time.

Once again, if you have someone you know that has been affected by cancer and would like me to run in honour of them (you don't need to donate to do this) please email me!

Not going to lie, I'm nervous about the fundraiser!! I'm hoping I'll be able to make a respectable amount of money from it.  I haven't been able to get a hold of the Molson Canadian swag so I doubt that will be there in time - that's not a worry though because I'll just save it for a pub night or other event.  Besides, with four bands playing that's a lot of entertainment ;) 50/50 tickets will be sold and of course, donations are accepted.

If anyone is reading this and wants to purchase tickets I think that the game plan will probably be that I'll stand outside of the library (far side - corner of Hamilton and Robson) due to a rule that I cannot sell tickets within four blocks of the club.  If you know me, just call me to ask and if you don't know me check back here to make sure I haven't changed the spot I'll be in. you'll have to pay the venue and then just buy a 50/50 ticket to give money to the Leukemia & Lymphoma Society.  I don't want to get in trouble for soliciting.

REMINDER: Make sure you bring TWO pieces of valid I.D. & have fun - be sure to say hi to me!!!

If you want to donate right now I won't object!

Today marks the passing of my grandmother.  I have many mixed emotions about this and I never really delve into this topic but I think it is suiting for this blog.

My grandmother was vibrant, fun, classy, independent, humourous, kind, humble, beautiful, and had a huge heart.   Everyone that had the privilege of knowing her loved her.  She always treated her family and friends better than herself.  She loved to see everyone smiling and tried her best to make you happy.  She always believed in me, never pointed out anything negative about myself, and knew what to say if I needed cheering up.  There are so many other words to describe her but I hope this has in essence captured a little bit about her.

When she was diagnosed with cancer I remember it feeling all too surreal.  Not my grandmother.  It had to be a mistake...much to my horror, it wasn't.  She underwent treatment and surgery that made her look frail and I remember thinking "If I hug her will I hurt her?"  The surgeon sliced some nerves by mistake which caused half her face to sag and look frozen.  You could tell she felt self conscience about it but she would not admit it or she'd poke fun at herself instead.

She was diagnosed with a cancer that only 0.010% of people get.  There was no specific treatment for it because it was so rare (I believe only 30 people were diagnosed with it ever by the time she found out...all had passed away.) So the surgery tried to remove all of the tumours and the radiation/chemo was just a hopeful afterthought.

She went into remission and she started to get her colour back in her face and gain some strength. All too soon we found out the cancer was back and this time with a vengeance.  What she thought was bronchitis turned out to be hundreds of tiny tumours in her lungs metastasizing rapidly also affecting her liver, kidneys, bones, brain, and other vital organs.  My family hopped on a flight...only six hours...yet she could be dead by the time we arrived. 

Fortunately, she was still alive when we landed.  Her smile lit up the room when we walked in and I was so thankful to see her joking around like the woman I knew and loved.  She went into hospice care that day.  The next few precious weeks consisted of taking care of her.  She did not want anyone knowing she was in pain because she did not want to worry us...her appendages even started to turn purple because she would lie about how much pain she was in (on a scale of 1-10 she always answered with a 4 or under.)  Lots of people came to visit her, give flowers, and support.  She did not pass away until every single family member had visited...she knew we were all coming, and she held on.  Slipping into a coma the day of her birthday...even still my little cousins made her decorations and threw a birthday party for their Nanny.  A few days after she passed away.

I miss her.  I am so thankful I had such a wonderful role model in my life.  That I received such love from her and have infinitely benefited  from seeing how amazing of a person she was.  Though this entry is depressing I have been able to remember brilliantly happy childhood memories and such great conversations I shared with her.   I have been celebrating the fact she had such a full life.  I strive to be even half of the great woman she was in my lifetime.

Before she entered her coma she asked me to promise her something on her deathbed.  I have not been able to fulfill that promise yet but I will.  Running this marathon, raising money for cancer research for a type that does not have reasonable survival stats is helping me keep that promise.  It's helping me keep her memory alive and hopefully it'll keep others from passing away.  No one should witness their loved ones and friends battle cancer and when it comes right down to it, that's what this marathon is all about.  I love you, Grandma.

I randomly just decided in the shower tonight that if I can raise $10,000.00 or more I will hack off my hair for donation to one of the Canadian Cancer Society's approved wig makers that goes to those with cancer. So you might all be thinking it's not a big deal but to me it is.  My hair is currently butt length, extremely thick, not chemically treated, and I love it.  So while hair does grow back it would be something personally very meaningful for me to let go of.  So please direct people to my blog and maybe you'll see me with a ridiculously short hair cut before I run my marathon.

Oh and I just wanted to throw this out there because I know I post a lot about trying to get fundraising but I certainly do not want ANY of you to feel guilty if you cannot contribute financially. Right now I can't contribute to myself even!  Just knowing I have people who care about my training and the ultimate cause is great.

It was recently brought to my attention that people without vox blogs can't leave input on here (boo to that!) You can always fire me an e-mail if you have any comments about my posts!

Before I go into today's workout lowdown I have some awesome news!  One of my best friends has generously donated $150.00 to the Leukemia & Lymphoma Society!  Thanks so much again, Sara!

I had another workout at the gym today. It was my "long run" equivalent and I did 15k on the bike and another 6k on the elliptical trainer.  It went well, I was sweating though didn't feel I was working as hard if I had been on a run, even with the resistance cranked. My shins and calves were definitely bothering me a lot today and I'm not really sure why. Hopefully they'll return to normal soon because I don't want to be a gym rat unless I have to be (read: -40C outside!) I iced it for an hour after and now they seem to be a bit better. ::cough:: still won't turn down a personal masseuse ::cough::

Oh but here is some JUICY news my friends....When I was showering I used my Ultra Swim (because I finally got my diving stuff back from Calgary) and the smell alone, and using my chamois as a sweat towel in the gym (yeah, I know you care SO much about that...) I was wistful for the pool.  So on Wednesday I am going SWIMMING my friends.  It shall be FANTASTIC.  I also might attempt a few dives (we'll see though...that could be asking for trouble with me).  I know you're probably all thinking I'm crazy to be excited over swimming but I have a love affair with water in general and any type of sport in it.

Wow, I need a haircut, haha :P

Sometimes I feel like people don't understand why I run...especially why I am training for a marathon.  I've had to watch loved ones go through radiation and chemo, I've seen them fight, laugh, love, break down, and live life while cancer was riddled through their bodies.  Unfortunately, loving them all you can won't cure them.  I run in memory of those who've died, I run in support of those currently facing a battle they never wanted to, and I run in hopes that a future generation will never know a world where cancer takes away the people around them. I also run to keep myself healthy and cancer free.

John Simpson has put together a campaign with Nike to give a little extra.  I find that it sums up my feelings very well too.  I have posted the video below (now if only these products were available in Canada!):

Here are some links to great organizations:
Leukemia & Lymphoma Society
Lance Armstrong Foundation
Sunsan G. Komen Foundation
Canadian Cancer Society

Also, my fundraising page.

So today while running I decided that I need to give myself more credit.  I've always been the type to push myself harder and harder and have never taken compliments well.  I've come extremely far in terms of personal growth but it is always still hard for me to take positive comments from others.  It's not that I don't think I deserve them - it's just that I'm always striving for perfection.

As I was running I got into a "my calves are tight..I can't run fast enough and we're supposed to be doing a speed workout" thought cycle.  So I decided I would just go at the fastest pace I could for the day.  Because that's what training is...you'll have some great days, good days and other ones won't be so hot but they all prepare you to run your race well.  So I just started to enjoy the run :)

At my second speed lap a guy walking in the opposite direction exclaimed, "now THAT is commitment, way to go!!!" and gestured to my hand.  I laughed and said thanks as I ran past but then it hit me...I am running injured.  I have my hand all wrapped up in gauze, a splint, tensor, tape, etc. and I've been running with it above my heart (to reduce swelling and jarring) for the past week.  So yes, I may not have had the best run today but I still got out there and did it.  Previously I've dismissed my broken hand because it's not a leg, ankle, knee...you know - a body part that takes the immediate pounding.  Also, I shrugged it off as no big deal because my broken hand compares like nothing to those going through chemo but I am running for them, I'm running for myself, I'm running for the sake of running.  I'm still going and trying my hardest so I think this was why I was able to run my fastest lap for the last one and then back to the runner's lounge at a decent pace...I finally gave myself some credit that I deserved.

Perhaps running is my perfect imperfection.

I love that I am a runner.  I love that I am training for a marathon.  I love that I am helping others while training.  I'm PROUD of myself and how far I've come thus far.

!!!!!!!YAY!!!!!!!!

Running for cancer research